Rough Times and Good Times

I'm a firm believer that the rough times pass. I also fully believe without the rough times the good times aren't nearly as sweet. The last week-and-half have felt like a year. The ups and downs of losing a beloved friend are bad enough, but to watch her loved ones survive her with such pain is just as hurtful. For the last couple days I've been consciously making the effort to stop trying reconcile Elysha's death -- because frankly there is no good reason. Period. Instead, I've been focusing on letting go of the pain. I think that's the hard part for everyone. It's almost like letting go of the pain is letting go of her, or our love for her. I wear the pain of her loss of her on my sleeve, and that's not what she would have wanted. I've been giving myself permission, quite literally, over and over again to let go of the pain and be okay with it. I'm choosing to remember how much I loved my beloved friend and how she loved others.